donpurdum
Are you tired of arguing, fighting, and feeling you’re never heard or understood?
Does it feel like you no longer have the strength to push forward and fight for your marriage?
I get it. Every day I hear it in so many people’s voices.
Everyone wants peace. The problem is that divorce is not the path to it for most people. The truth is that Satan has devised one of the greatest schemes of the devil ever devised against mankind — Disposable marriage under the guise of peace and hope.
There is no hope or peace in divorce.
Many people who are divorced take the hurt of a failed marriage into every relationship that follows. If you could see the path of one’s life, it would look like that of a massive tornado that traveled a hundred miles and destroyed everything in its path.
While God’s grace covers a multitude of sins, He doesn’t remove the consequences of our choices.
Divorce is a ripping apart of the one flesh that God made us into through marriage. It forever changes the trajectories of our lives. It scares one’s soul. It hurts your family and kids. It destroys dreams, businesses, and personal finances.
The truth is the road to separation occurs long before the tragic event itself.
- Inflecting unfair or unrealistic expectations on one another.
- Subtly or overtly trying to control one another instead of trusting in God.
- Harsh words that lead to defensiveness.
- Never feeling heard or understood.
- Pushing God further and further into the background and neglecting Him in our hurt and pain.
So many have fallen prey to the belief that divorce is the only way out.
It’s not.
It’s the only way to more pain. There is no healing in divorce.
In Luke 14:27, Jesus said, “Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after Me cannot be my disciple.”
In Matthew 16:24, Jesus said, “Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone wants to come after Me, he must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow Me.”
In the first century, the cross was an abhorrent symbol. The cross was the most detestable thing ever created by mankind. It led to unimaginable pain, suffering, and death.
In Christ, we are called to deny ourselves and put God first and others before ourselves. In Galatians 6:2, the Apostle Paul writes, “Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ.”
Your marriage is not about “you.”
It’s about “us.”
It’s about God and following Him. It’s about trusting Him. It’s about surrendering self to Him and to your spouse.
In Ephesians 5, we are reminded that marriage is a “mini-Church.” Husbands and wives are the representation of God’s grace in the world. The Church submits to Christ. He loved the Bride so much that He gave His life up for her.
Your marriage isn’t just a covenant with God… It’s an example to the world of God’s love. When someone chooses “me” over “us,” what does that say about God or His Church?
True peace, love, acceptance, and respect ought to be in our marriage. It ought to be a safe place.
If you want to experience true peace. If you want to experience the marriage that God has for you… There is hope!
You may not be able to see it right now. As Romans 8:24-25 says, “…but hope that is seen is not hope; for who hopes for what he already sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, with perseverance we wait eagerly for it.
Building on that, Hebrews 11:1 says, “Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”
I hope to meet you soon (virtually of course).
Father Don
