donpurdum
Over the years, I’ve worked with hundreds of couples and individuals. Interestingly, the more I work with those struggling in their marriage, the more one pattern emerges that indicates the true struggle they’re experiencing.
I’ve seen over and over again the one pattern that sets apart great marriages from mediocre or dissolving ones.
I can guarantee you, this is always at the core in some way, shape, form, or fashion.
It has nothing to do with psychology (according to the elementary principles of the world) or empty and vain philosophies. The pop psychology that has infiltrated the church is hurting far more than it is helping when it comes to marriage and resolving conflict or communication problems.
Here’s the truth…
The quality of your relationship with God will dictate the blessings or curses of your marriage.
So, what does this mean?
On the surface, it may appear obvious, but is it?
See, understanding God is a function of knowing Him. Knowing Him leads to fruit in our lives. The more we walk with Him, the more we seek to please Him. The more we experience Him in the fullness of the faith we have inherited through the Church — The more we live in the likeness of Christ.
The more we seek Him, the more we become like Him.
What is He like? The answer is found in the “fruits of the Spirit” in Galatians 5:22-23: “Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control”…
This is Christ. This is Him in us through the Holy Spirit.
These aren’t just words on a page.
Living these attributes isn’t possible in the flesh. That’s why the Apostle Paul called it the “fruits of the Spirit.”
See, these attributes are a choice.
You can choose to live in Christ or in the flesh—but you can’t live in both at the same time. You must commit to living in Christ in the public, private, and secret areas of your life.
The Christian couples who have incredible marriages have learned how to live as Christ.
Now, you might be saying to yourself, “Duh.”
Yet, how many of us are actually doing it?
If you were, your marriage would be drastically different. The way you address one another, talk to one another, and communicate non-verbally would be radically different.
Instead of chaos, there would be peace.
Instead of anger and resentment, there would be love, understanding, and patience.
Why?
Because Christ would be at the center of your life and your marriage.
You would be seeking to gain a benefit instead of avoiding a loss.
You would choose to relinquish control and choose to surrender to Christ all outcomes.
Living by faith and not by sight is much harder than controlling situations, manipulating outcomes, and ultimately living in fear. Control may feel good, but it’s destructive. You will almost always get the very thing you don’t want when you’re the one in control instead of God.
So, the truth is…
The closer you are to Christ, the more you learn and understand Him, the more you imitate Him… The more real He becomes.
The quality of your relationship with God will dictate the blessings or curses of your marriage. The closer you are to Him, the more love, care, respect, understanding, and affection you will give and receive with and through your spouse.
The farther from Him you are, the quicker you move away from the fruits of the Spirit resulting in behavior that brings about guilt, shame, anger, resentment, bitterness, chaos, and destruction.
The choice is yours.
Now, here’s another truth.
You can’t do this on your own. This is why discipleship is so important. You must be discipled. You must learn to get off of milk and onto solid food.
Hebrews 5:12-14 says,
“For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you have need again for someone to teach you the elementary principles of the oracles of God, and you have come to need milk and not solid food. For everyone who partakes only of milk is not accustomed to the word of righteousness, for he is an infant. But solid food is for the mature, who because of practice have their senses trained to discern good and evil.”
Spiritual maturity is a process. It can’t be done alone or in a vacuum.
If you’re ready to step into the marriage God has for you. If you’re ready for healing and reconciliation…
There is hope for your marriage!!!
For a very limited time, I’m opening up my exclusive Miracle Marriage Mentorship – normally reserved for private clients – completely FREE for 14 days.
Inside, you’ll discover:
- Two powerful weekly group sessions with direct access to me
- The Biblical blueprint that’s helping Christians win back their spouses
- Live “Workshop Calls” where I personally address YOUR exact situation
- A supportive brotherhood of Christian men fighting for their marriages
- Emergency access to our private community
Plus, I’ll reveal the hidden spiritual attack that’s targeting Christian marriages (hint: it’s NOT what most marriage counselors think)
This special 14-day trial closes soon.
God is offering you a path forward.
When you claim your free 1-1 call you can get access to the entire mentorship program – completely free – for 14 days.
But I have to warn you, this is for a VERY limited time.
We’re doing this as our “Black Friday” special, and we’re starting it early.
So if you want me to help you FREE for two weeks, this is your absolute best chance.
